At Zomee, we believe every mom deserves a village, and doulas are an essential part of that support system. Often misunderstood or overlooked, doulas provide emotional, educational, and physical support during pregnancy, birth, and the postpartum period. They are the reassuring presence that helps parents navigate both the joys and the challenges of welcoming a new baby.
To shed light on the vital role doulas play, we spoke with Caitlin Wilder, a Los Angeles-based doula, podcaster, and mom of two. Through her work at Wilder Beginnings, Caitlin helps families feel empowered and cared for during one of life’s most transformative experiences. Here, she shares what doulas really do, how they support both parents, and her heartfelt advice for new families finding their way.
Interview with Caitlin Wilder
For those who aren’t familiar, how would you explain the role of a doula during pregnancy, birth, and postpartum?
The role of a doula can be hard to sum up because they truly do so much! During pregnancy, doulas offer education and ongoing support. If you’re seeing an OBGYN, you might only have a few short visits - but your doula is the opposite. They want to hear your questions, talk often, and celebrate your baby right alongside you.
During birth, doulas don’t perform medical procedures or get between you and your care team. Instead, they help you advocate for yourself, explain what’s happening, and offer comfort measures - like suggesting positions or techniques to ease pain. They also support partners by guiding them in how to help so they can focus on being present. Unlike hospital staff with shift changes, your doula stays with you the whole time.
Postpartum doulas offer an incredible range of support - from meal prep and laundry to newborn care and emotional guidance. Each doula brings something unique: some focus on education, others on massage or cooking. Whatever your needs, there’s a doula out there who fits them.
What does support from a doula look like in the first few weeks at home with a newborn?
It really depends on what the parents need. Some families want hands-on help with feeding or diaper changes so they can rest, while others want support with chores and baby-related tasks so mom can focus on bonding. Every family’s needs are different, and doulas adapt to meet them.
How do you support not just moms, but also partners in adjusting to life with a new baby?
Honestly, I think the person who benefits most from a doula during birth is often the partner! We expect them to know how to support their loved one physically and emotionally and take in the birth of their own child; it’s a lot. A doula helps relieve that pressure so the partner can be fully present.
After birth, doulas also help normalize what both mom and baby are experiencing. Postpartum can be hard to put into words, and a doula can serve as a compassionate bridge for communication and understanding.
What kinds of guidance do you offer partners to help them feel confident and involved in baby care?
Get involved! Don’t be scared! No one knows exactly what they’re doing at first. And remember, babies are more resilient than we think.
How do you balance emotional support with practical “hands-on” help for new parents?
A great doula can read the room. Some parents want hands-on support, while others just need a calm presence or someone to listen. Every postpartum visit can look different. It’s about sensing what your clients need in that moment and meeting them exactly where they are.
When it comes to feeding - whether breastfeeding, pumping, or bottle feeding - what role do you play in helping parents make choices that work for their family?
A doula’s role is to support whatever choice is best for their client. We can offer information, resources, and referrals, but it’s not our place to push one method over another. What worked for one person may not be right for another and that’s okay.
How do you introduce pumping to parents who are curious or nervous about it?
Taking the time to calmly go through all the pump parts together helps a lot. I’ll often have parents set it up and try it while I’m there to make sure everything fits comfortably. It’s also important as a doula to have a list of great referrals; if a doula isn’t a Certified Lactation Consultant, they’ll likely know one that they can connect their client with to learn more about pumping or feeding.
What are some of the most common concerns new parents bring up, and how do you help ease those worries?
Sleep! Everyone worries they’ll never sleep again. I always remind parents: you will sleep. It just takes time. And that the postpartum phase, while intense, isn’t permanent. You’ll feel like yourself again, and life will settle into a new rhythm.
Are there any myths or misconceptions about early parenthood that you find yourself debunking often?
That everyone else knows what they’re doing. No one does! And that babies sleep through the night right away or love their bassinets; that is so rare.
If you could give new parents (and their partners) one piece of advice to carry with them into those early weeks, what would it be?
Trust your gut, and mute anything or anyone making you doubt yourself. Holding your baby is never the wrong choice. Forget perfection, skip the comparisons, and do what feels right for you. Your baby picked you for a reason.
Doulas offer more than just guidance; they bring reassurance, comfort, and community to families when they need it most. As Caitlin reminds us, every parent’s journey is unique, and having the right support can make all the difference.
To learn more about Caitlin and her work, visit Wilder Beginnings or follow her on Instagram at @wilderbeginnings.
